I've recently discovered I have a psychological issue. Self diagnosed, yes, but I'm pretty certain on it. The issue I have is living in the correct time period with everyone else. Allow me to explain...
For about 10 years now I've had the first four Harry Potter books. I read the first one when I was thirteen, then never touched the others and moved on with my life. And it was a pretty good life without them. Under my personal opinion, I functioned well with normal society without being well versed in the world of Harry Potter. Given, I encountered MANY individuals who gave their lives to this Potter fellow, buying the books the day of their release and reading them non-stop in one day. Then the movies came out, and that only made things worse (For their addiction, not for me). I didn't quite follow all these people to Hogwarts each year, with great expectation for the next installment. Instead, my copies of Chamber of Secrets, Prisoner of Azkaban, and Goblet of Fire sat on the bookshelf collecting dust.
Until about three months ago.
I finally cracked. Part one of The Deathly Hollows came out last November, and my friend Vanessa invited me to see it opening night. Now, I had seen the film adaptations of Order of the Phoenix and Half-blood Prince prior, but this time it finally dawned on me: "Perhaps, these last ten years, I've been missing something. I feel out of the loop and now I want to be in it."
So, at the start of December I started my journey to Hogwarts, beginning with The Sorcerer's Stone. I'm about a third of the way through Goblet of Fire at this point. Still hooked and plan to finish the rest of the series just to say I did before that last movie comes out.
Now, my point being, I should have read these things a long time ago. I'm 24 years old, it's 2011. I'm not with the program. I'm still in the 2000's. And worst of all, I suddenly have no one to talk to them about. These people who were super excited and obsessed about these books have moved on with their lives. It's about the Obama Administration, the economy, healthcare, the politcal upheaval in North Africa, Twilight, Justin Beiber, Lady Gaga in an egg.
Well...after I finish these books, in a couple years, I'll start watching Lost. And I'll get really excited and want to talk about it. But no one will listen. They'll tell me things like, "Mike, that was like 10 years ago. You missed it, get over it". Or I'll buy a Lady Gaga album in 2020 and talk about how good it is and people will say, "Mike, Lady Gaga built a spaceship and drove it into the sun. The gaga for Gaga phase is over."
Who Am I? What have I become?
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Friday, February 18, 2011
Motivation.
Alright. So it's been awhile. Forgive me.
I was beginning to wonder if something happened to me as well. "Oh no...what if Michael is in a ditch somewhere with two broken legs and we can't hear him? Oh, wait..."
I wanted to post something back in December. Really, I did. Then I realized it wasn't worth it and that I could just call up David (undoubtedly my most loyal...and really only...blog follower) whenever I had something of worth to talk about. Then I kind of tickled the notion of maybe, POSSIBLY, posting back in January. Once again, couldn't bring myself to log on, stare at the computer idlely until something great popped into my head to type about. But today I figured, "I'm here...why not."
So welcome back! Big news right now...the blog, if you hadn't noticed already, is officially a year old. I thought about getting him a cake so he could slop around in it and then I could video tape the whole thing and show it to him later to embarrass him, but then I realized the blog is not a living entity (In spite of the title).
Still serving the Tea Lords in an endless effort to bring precious capital into their establishment. It's tough because I find little to no reason to give all my effort. When I don't recieve acknowledgement or praise or really any sort of value in my work, I tend to not care quite as much. Especially when constantly it's my weaknesses that are being highlighted and very, very rarely my strengths. Not to say that my pride and ego need to be inflated constantly. Or maybe they do and that's a shortcoming on my part, but I think we should get some return for our work even if it is, "Hey, good job".
It could be that I'm just soft and whiny. Some people never get recognition, work hard week after week, coming home tired with little time or energy left for hobbies or people.
That's the reason there hasn't been a post on here in three months. Lack of motivation. It's like I need some end goal, or something of worth to keep me going otherwise I feel like whatever I'm doing is just killing time and I don't want to kill time because I don't need to. I have things to do, people to meet, places to see, escape plans to make, one life to live. If there is no purpose or value I feel as if it's a waste (Says the man who spends countless hours on Facebook).
I will try to diligently continue to post on this site though. No matter how many people see this I need to understand that this is working the writer that is slowly wasting away inside me. This blog is like practicing scales on an instrument, stretches and exercises before a big run or game, a sketchbook for the artist. There's a muscle in my brain that will need constant training and development, so if I can just focus on that I'll be more willing to post on here.
No if I could just do the same for when I work in the Tea Mines of Moria...
I was beginning to wonder if something happened to me as well. "Oh no...what if Michael is in a ditch somewhere with two broken legs and we can't hear him? Oh, wait..."
I wanted to post something back in December. Really, I did. Then I realized it wasn't worth it and that I could just call up David (undoubtedly my most loyal...and really only...blog follower) whenever I had something of worth to talk about. Then I kind of tickled the notion of maybe, POSSIBLY, posting back in January. Once again, couldn't bring myself to log on, stare at the computer idlely until something great popped into my head to type about. But today I figured, "I'm here...why not."
So welcome back! Big news right now...the blog, if you hadn't noticed already, is officially a year old. I thought about getting him a cake so he could slop around in it and then I could video tape the whole thing and show it to him later to embarrass him, but then I realized the blog is not a living entity (In spite of the title).
Still serving the Tea Lords in an endless effort to bring precious capital into their establishment. It's tough because I find little to no reason to give all my effort. When I don't recieve acknowledgement or praise or really any sort of value in my work, I tend to not care quite as much. Especially when constantly it's my weaknesses that are being highlighted and very, very rarely my strengths. Not to say that my pride and ego need to be inflated constantly. Or maybe they do and that's a shortcoming on my part, but I think we should get some return for our work even if it is, "Hey, good job".
It could be that I'm just soft and whiny. Some people never get recognition, work hard week after week, coming home tired with little time or energy left for hobbies or people.
That's the reason there hasn't been a post on here in three months. Lack of motivation. It's like I need some end goal, or something of worth to keep me going otherwise I feel like whatever I'm doing is just killing time and I don't want to kill time because I don't need to. I have things to do, people to meet, places to see, escape plans to make, one life to live. If there is no purpose or value I feel as if it's a waste (Says the man who spends countless hours on Facebook).
I will try to diligently continue to post on this site though. No matter how many people see this I need to understand that this is working the writer that is slowly wasting away inside me. This blog is like practicing scales on an instrument, stretches and exercises before a big run or game, a sketchbook for the artist. There's a muscle in my brain that will need constant training and development, so if I can just focus on that I'll be more willing to post on here.
No if I could just do the same for when I work in the Tea Mines of Moria...
Thursday, November 4, 2010
"Our Set Tonight Is...Not Exact. It Could Go A Lot Of Different Ways. So Just Hang With Us. We'll Get There."
Love that line. Recently (yesterday) I pulled out my copy of my last band's live recording so I could play along with it. I did this a lot 2 or 3 years ago, especially after the band split, mostly because I still wanted to play but had no band to play with. Like the Rhesus Monkey, I created my own surrogate band to deposit my creativity and emotion (but unlike the Rhesus monkey, my band mates weren't remade with terry cloth. They weren't remade at all. Also, I didn't have that much terry cloth on hand). That recording provided hours of listening and playing even after the death of All Else Fails...
Anyway, I pulled it out yesterday, popped it into the DVD player in the living room, set up my bass, amp, and pedals, and went ahead to relive the dream. I'm already beginning to forget some of the parts. Still, most of the lines are still intact in my brain.
BUT THE LINE....focus on the line...Mike Bay (Our Guitar Player/keyboradist/singer of the time. Not the creator of such popcorn flicks like Transformers and Armageddon) opens the whole set up with,
"Here's the deal. We're kind of a rock/jam band. Uh...we like to jam...so uh...our set tonight is, uh...not exact. It could go a lot of different ways. So uh...just hang with us. We'll get there".
It sounded awkward then, and each and everytime I listen to it. But it's the best opener for us or any other band. Seriously, it would be a great opener for life. It's so humble. It's so brutally honest too: "We are just a rock/jam kind of band. A handful of kids whacking on drums and waving our hands up and down the necks of guitars and basses. This sound could go a lot of different ways. This may not be what you expected. You probably won't get your money's worth. You may hate us. But please, just sit down, listen. This is a ride. We're going to get somewhere. We will find someplace. Together". How proper.
I generally have this problem of romanticizing the past (The band being one of those past moments I render in my mind as something far more beautiful than it actually was). I've started to do that lately. Remembering the good parts of high school and college. Which is bad. It means I'm not engaged in the moment, in the current times, in reality. I'm bored and I look to past events as missed and gone opportunities. Thinking through the "What-if's". It's self damaging. Self-loathing to some degree. When you get bored, when you get trapped, that's sometimes all you can think about. A time when you know (or think you know) things were much better and happier than what is currently happening. It's not, but the brain likes to fool itself. Focusing solely on the beautiful rather than the crap that it mistakenly misplaced in the ol' memory bank.
Another line from our band. From a song entitled, As It All Falls Apart:
"I wish it could all come back. I need it to all come back. When will it all come back, before I fall apart?"
Never. It's said and done. Move forward.
A modern day sage once said, "Nothing good happens without choices". I guess if we want some good we're going to have to make a few decisions.
I've said my peace. Until next time.
Anyway, I pulled it out yesterday, popped it into the DVD player in the living room, set up my bass, amp, and pedals, and went ahead to relive the dream. I'm already beginning to forget some of the parts. Still, most of the lines are still intact in my brain.
BUT THE LINE....focus on the line...Mike Bay (Our Guitar Player/keyboradist/singer of the time. Not the creator of such popcorn flicks like Transformers and Armageddon) opens the whole set up with,
"Here's the deal. We're kind of a rock/jam band. Uh...we like to jam...so uh...our set tonight is, uh...not exact. It could go a lot of different ways. So uh...just hang with us. We'll get there".
It sounded awkward then, and each and everytime I listen to it. But it's the best opener for us or any other band. Seriously, it would be a great opener for life. It's so humble. It's so brutally honest too: "We are just a rock/jam kind of band. A handful of kids whacking on drums and waving our hands up and down the necks of guitars and basses. This sound could go a lot of different ways. This may not be what you expected. You probably won't get your money's worth. You may hate us. But please, just sit down, listen. This is a ride. We're going to get somewhere. We will find someplace. Together". How proper.
I generally have this problem of romanticizing the past (The band being one of those past moments I render in my mind as something far more beautiful than it actually was). I've started to do that lately. Remembering the good parts of high school and college. Which is bad. It means I'm not engaged in the moment, in the current times, in reality. I'm bored and I look to past events as missed and gone opportunities. Thinking through the "What-if's". It's self damaging. Self-loathing to some degree. When you get bored, when you get trapped, that's sometimes all you can think about. A time when you know (or think you know) things were much better and happier than what is currently happening. It's not, but the brain likes to fool itself. Focusing solely on the beautiful rather than the crap that it mistakenly misplaced in the ol' memory bank.
Another line from our band. From a song entitled, As It All Falls Apart:
"I wish it could all come back. I need it to all come back. When will it all come back, before I fall apart?"
Never. It's said and done. Move forward.
A modern day sage once said, "Nothing good happens without choices". I guess if we want some good we're going to have to make a few decisions.
I've said my peace. Until next time.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
"My Life is a Vast Inconsequential Epic with a Thousand and a Million Characters"
All right. Stop freaking out. I'm back.
My long time friend and associate has been very displeased concerning the lack of blog updates within the last two and a half months. I don't blame him. So, in an effort to settle his mind, mouth and bones, I'm updating. So if this post turns out lame, it's because I was bullied into doing it. And mostly because I have a cloud of guilt hanging over me.
Wow, August 5th was the last entry. To be honest, quite a bit has happened since then. I finally escaped the call center about August 14th. With some ambition, strong feelings on freedom, a couple of grenades and an iron will, you can achieve almost anything. Especially escape from a windowless job.
I also stopped watching Bob Ross as much. I noticed the show doesn't have the same effect on me as it did during my time at the Spherion call center. I would come home on a Tuesday or Thursday night around 11:30. I would turn on the Create channel and listen to his soothing voice as his worn, liver spotted hands manipulated a canvas in ways I never dreamed possible by any other human being. The tambre of his voice, the creation of a serene landscape, and his ability to some degree narrate a story as he made worlds with nothing more than phalo blue and okre yellow put me in a state of mind that could only be aptly termed as, "Zen peace". Yes, each episode was like attaining enlightenment. Happiness is naught but the moment. Surrender desire and suffering. Ohm.
Now, it doesn't give quite the same zen state. It's as if I need a bigger buzz to find that happy place (no, I haven't turned to drugs). Or, more likely, his show served it's purpose for me. Now I'm able to find serenity without the afroed sage explaining how to paint a wave. But, I'm glad he was there for me before, back when I thought there was nothing more to life than answering 50 calls a day and sitting in a chair doing nothing the rest of the time.
Now your question is (if you don't know me. Which I know you're just David. BUT, if by some strange chance you've never met me and now you're reading this, having the absolute time of your life..) where did I go after the call center?
The tea business. That's where.
Suprised? Don't be. It's only my near obsession. Travis Lund, my current boss, hired me on shortly (very shortly) before I escaped the clutches of Spherion. I'm currently serving my time (part-time) at Teavana in Plaza Frontenac (a very high end mall in St. Louis. I'm not bragging, believe you me. I'm actually intimidated everytime I'm there). I stand around most the time, handing out free samples at our sample cart at the entrance of the store. I drink a lot of free tea. Sometimes an individual, or a couple, or even a whole family or crowd of friends come in and want to buy tea to take home and brew and have little tea parties. And I always get the question, "What's the smallest amount I can buy?"
You've got to be kidding me.
I know you make a lot. You shop in this mall. You just bought pants from Saks Fifth Avenue, or Banana Republic, or Juicy that probably costs 2 weeks worth of wages from my part time job, and you can only shell out 20 bucks? You buy a freaking pound of coffee from Starbucks (or drink a pound of it each week when you go to order a latte. Don't lie to me!), and a pound or half pound of tea is "too much"? Dumb. Buy more tea. That way you're healthy, you have a tasty drink to have at home, and I make sales. Yes, I need to make sales so I don't have to go to sleep at night wondering, "Will Travis throw me out of the tea business? Literally, throw me out?"
It doesn't matter. You consumers are American, and you're obviously not raging capitalists. You're Americans and you like tea about as much as you like to watch or care about Soccer when it's NOT the World Cup. You know what you like. Who says that Americans are blind consumers? They know what to buy in these trying economic times.
Alright, enough of that.
On another note, David Lechner is married to his beautiful and wonderful wife Kathryn, who is, by the way, the only Kathryn I know to spell her name in such a cool way. I know, it really wasn't her decision, she just followed through with it. So Kathryn, tell your parents nice job on spelling it like that.
The wedding was great. I got to see Oregon, hang out with asians, stand next to Dave and be his best man; Dave got a wife. Everyone wins. Oh, and delicious pie and cake were involved.
Dave had a lot of great people who helped make the wedding not only possible but a very beautiful event (with the exception of the photographer. See Dave Lechner's blog). Tom is a mad man on piano (and Pokemon). A great and very memorable weekend altogether (I could go into better details, but I'm very hungry. Still have yet to eat breakfast).
I haven't much more to say beyond that. Those were by far the greatest details of the gaping hole of time I neglected to fill in on "Revenge of the Living Blog". Hopefully (prayerfully) there will be more blogs to blog. Hopefully I will take advantage of the dead air in my life and type some stuff down. Take care, have a safe Halloween. Don't trick or treat by yourself. Always bring a buddy. Don't go to houses that look like they'll hand out heroin (unless you're into that sort of thing. Even then, I advise to get off the smack). I'll be back here sometime in the near future.
Peace.
My long time friend and associate has been very displeased concerning the lack of blog updates within the last two and a half months. I don't blame him. So, in an effort to settle his mind, mouth and bones, I'm updating. So if this post turns out lame, it's because I was bullied into doing it. And mostly because I have a cloud of guilt hanging over me.
Wow, August 5th was the last entry. To be honest, quite a bit has happened since then. I finally escaped the call center about August 14th. With some ambition, strong feelings on freedom, a couple of grenades and an iron will, you can achieve almost anything. Especially escape from a windowless job.
I also stopped watching Bob Ross as much. I noticed the show doesn't have the same effect on me as it did during my time at the Spherion call center. I would come home on a Tuesday or Thursday night around 11:30. I would turn on the Create channel and listen to his soothing voice as his worn, liver spotted hands manipulated a canvas in ways I never dreamed possible by any other human being. The tambre of his voice, the creation of a serene landscape, and his ability to some degree narrate a story as he made worlds with nothing more than phalo blue and okre yellow put me in a state of mind that could only be aptly termed as, "Zen peace". Yes, each episode was like attaining enlightenment. Happiness is naught but the moment. Surrender desire and suffering. Ohm.
Now, it doesn't give quite the same zen state. It's as if I need a bigger buzz to find that happy place (no, I haven't turned to drugs). Or, more likely, his show served it's purpose for me. Now I'm able to find serenity without the afroed sage explaining how to paint a wave. But, I'm glad he was there for me before, back when I thought there was nothing more to life than answering 50 calls a day and sitting in a chair doing nothing the rest of the time.
Now your question is (if you don't know me. Which I know you're just David. BUT, if by some strange chance you've never met me and now you're reading this, having the absolute time of your life..) where did I go after the call center?
The tea business. That's where.
Suprised? Don't be. It's only my near obsession. Travis Lund, my current boss, hired me on shortly (very shortly) before I escaped the clutches of Spherion. I'm currently serving my time (part-time) at Teavana in Plaza Frontenac (a very high end mall in St. Louis. I'm not bragging, believe you me. I'm actually intimidated everytime I'm there). I stand around most the time, handing out free samples at our sample cart at the entrance of the store. I drink a lot of free tea. Sometimes an individual, or a couple, or even a whole family or crowd of friends come in and want to buy tea to take home and brew and have little tea parties. And I always get the question, "What's the smallest amount I can buy?"
You've got to be kidding me.
I know you make a lot. You shop in this mall. You just bought pants from Saks Fifth Avenue, or Banana Republic, or Juicy that probably costs 2 weeks worth of wages from my part time job, and you can only shell out 20 bucks? You buy a freaking pound of coffee from Starbucks (or drink a pound of it each week when you go to order a latte. Don't lie to me!), and a pound or half pound of tea is "too much"? Dumb. Buy more tea. That way you're healthy, you have a tasty drink to have at home, and I make sales. Yes, I need to make sales so I don't have to go to sleep at night wondering, "Will Travis throw me out of the tea business? Literally, throw me out?"
It doesn't matter. You consumers are American, and you're obviously not raging capitalists. You're Americans and you like tea about as much as you like to watch or care about Soccer when it's NOT the World Cup. You know what you like. Who says that Americans are blind consumers? They know what to buy in these trying economic times.
Alright, enough of that.
On another note, David Lechner is married to his beautiful and wonderful wife Kathryn, who is, by the way, the only Kathryn I know to spell her name in such a cool way. I know, it really wasn't her decision, she just followed through with it. So Kathryn, tell your parents nice job on spelling it like that.
The wedding was great. I got to see Oregon, hang out with asians, stand next to Dave and be his best man; Dave got a wife. Everyone wins. Oh, and delicious pie and cake were involved.
Dave had a lot of great people who helped make the wedding not only possible but a very beautiful event (with the exception of the photographer. See Dave Lechner's blog). Tom is a mad man on piano (and Pokemon). A great and very memorable weekend altogether (I could go into better details, but I'm very hungry. Still have yet to eat breakfast).
I haven't much more to say beyond that. Those were by far the greatest details of the gaping hole of time I neglected to fill in on "Revenge of the Living Blog". Hopefully (prayerfully) there will be more blogs to blog. Hopefully I will take advantage of the dead air in my life and type some stuff down. Take care, have a safe Halloween. Don't trick or treat by yourself. Always bring a buddy. Don't go to houses that look like they'll hand out heroin (unless you're into that sort of thing. Even then, I advise to get off the smack). I'll be back here sometime in the near future.
Peace.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Life Is Donkey Kong
Well I made it to Chicago and back with little to no problem. Parking in Chicago is awful ($19 a day to park in the lower lot of the McCormick conference center, $15 a day to park at the Hyatt Regency). Of all the expenses I paid for while in Chicago (Gas, food, misc.) parking was about half. Which was not what I was expecting. But things worked out because Spherion directed a deposit into my checking account while I stayed in Chicago. Thanks Spherion.
"Well, you're the one who spent hours in a chair, staring at a screen talking to customers about their rewards points."
Ah, yes. That's right. I did do that in order to earn the money.
Like I said before, this was my first adventure to Chicago. Sorry I didn't update while I was there, but there was no free wifi (I mean, it's Chicago). The Hyatt was asking for $10-$15 for 24 hours of internet use. I opted to keep my money. I figured it was not dire that I had access to the internet.
The place what beautiful. Lot's of construction going on all through Illinois though. The deep dish pizza tasted good. Had some watermelon Italian ice with Lauren Cox, Craig Peterson, and Ira Erum at a little pizza spot not too far from the hotel. I got to drive through China town, which for me of course is a real treat. Let's see...there was a random marathon Sunday morning near the conference center. Josh Strauther from the LA church rode with me over to the conference center. We were already running late because you need your hotel key to escape the hotel parking garage. Another thing you need is to pay the $45 dollars for 3 days of parking before the machine (Yes. Machine. Freaking robots) allows you leave the parking garage. So, we're trying to catch up and get to the conference center (Well, getting to isn't really what needed to be done. The hotel was already a siamese twin/tumour to the EXTREMELY large McCormick center. Really, we just needed to drive around to the other side of it to park in the lower lot and make our way to the Arie Crown Theater) to practice for the Sunday morning service. As we go down 31st (I'm not sure on that number. It was something like that) toward Lake Shore Drive, we see part of Lake Shore Drive is blocked off. But why? A freaking Marathon. So, there's this random marathon happening right where we need to turn in. We do make it to the lower lot, race toward the Arie Crown Theater, and show up a half hour late. Despite all that, the car ride there was hilarious.
No one ever expects the Chicago marathon...
Sorry for that long story/anecdote/rant.
Anyway, the weekend was also incredibly refreshing spiritually as well as mentally and emotionally. I got to see a lot of people I haven't seen in at least a year, like Carl Sullivan and John Hyon. Met a lot of new people. Most of the new people I met served and played in the worship which may have been the best part of the weekend. The Arie Crown Theater seats about 4,000 people. We had about 2,000 college students attending the conference. Each night we played a set of worship music to 2,000 fired up college students. It was miraculous and placed me in a spot that made me feel completely and wholy intuned with everything. When I played and worshiped I was living inside the moment, focused on God and the rhythms, united in a beautiful way with all these people. Then on Sunday, the Chicago church as well as all the conference attendees from all over the country (and some from Canada, the Carribean, and South Africa) came together, filling the theater out completely. Amazing is the most simple and apt description I can give.
This past weekend was a weekend that gave me a certain hope. For a while my hope and dreams were beginning to dissipate. I was losing faith in what could be, what I wanted for myself in the future, and I figured all of what I dreamed of was impossible. I've reached my own conclusions that that is not entirely true.
Before I left, I started to study out in the Bible what it means to seek God. In the back of my smaller Bible I have a little concordence/index. I looked up 'seek' and read all the scriptures listed. One scripture I focused mainly on is from Matthew 6 where it says, "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you." I figured in order to see God, we must know what the kingdom is as well as righteousness.
After looking more, reading more, I came to the conclusion that if I want to seek God, I have to follow Jesus. "No one comes to the father except through me." That made sense to me, so I decided to follow Jesus through the gospels starting with Matthew (which I'm close to finishing).
When I was packing for the ICMC (International Campus Ministry Conference) I didn't know what the theme would be about or what sort of lessons were planned. So when I arrived and saw that the theme was "Follow Me", I was a little shocked. Just prior to driving up to Chicago I decided this is what I needed to do and study out in order to seek God. Things were beginning to align. Throughout the weekend I continued to read through Matthew, and as I did, the lessons in the evening would focus on scriptures I had read earlier that day. Not to be egotistical, but I think God prepared my heart for this weekend so that I would be attentive as well as impacted by the whole event.
There were also a lot of classes and lessons about the one-year challenge, the one-year challenge being taking a year out of your professional or academic life and going to another church to help in it's development and expand God's kingdom. There's a great need for it now, especially in places like South Africa, China, Turkey, Salt Lake City, and Anchorage Alaska.
This is something that has been on my heart for at least the last year. My passion for it dwindled considerably, as I said before I was losing my dreams thinking things like a full time job would put me down. Listening to people talk about the one-year challenge rekindled my dreams and desire to serve wherever in the world God wants me. If I could, I would go around the world for the rest of my life doing this, but that may not be in the play book. Hopefully, prayerfully, I can do the one-year challenge in the not-so distant future. Already I'm talking to a disciple in China about coming over and teaching English and help strengthen the churches there.
There's so much more I could talk about, but I feel like I've written too much.
As for the title of the post, I thought I would get to it sooner in my train of thought but apparently not. It was something I said during the course of the weekend. "Life is Donkey Kong" meaning, if life is some grand game, it wouldn't be one with bosses. We all have different bosses to face, we don't all live the same life and struggles, so to think of life as a Mario or Zelda or Final Fantasy game would not be true. Life is a high scoring game. You do the best possible, whatever that may be, and submit your score. Like Donkey Kong (the old one. Not Country). So, Life is Donkey Kong.
That didn't really have anything to do with the other 65 sentences, come to think of it.
Hope you enjoyed. Later gators.
"Well, you're the one who spent hours in a chair, staring at a screen talking to customers about their rewards points."
Ah, yes. That's right. I did do that in order to earn the money.
Like I said before, this was my first adventure to Chicago. Sorry I didn't update while I was there, but there was no free wifi (I mean, it's Chicago). The Hyatt was asking for $10-$15 for 24 hours of internet use. I opted to keep my money. I figured it was not dire that I had access to the internet.
The place what beautiful. Lot's of construction going on all through Illinois though. The deep dish pizza tasted good. Had some watermelon Italian ice with Lauren Cox, Craig Peterson, and Ira Erum at a little pizza spot not too far from the hotel. I got to drive through China town, which for me of course is a real treat. Let's see...there was a random marathon Sunday morning near the conference center. Josh Strauther from the LA church rode with me over to the conference center. We were already running late because you need your hotel key to escape the hotel parking garage. Another thing you need is to pay the $45 dollars for 3 days of parking before the machine (Yes. Machine. Freaking robots) allows you leave the parking garage. So, we're trying to catch up and get to the conference center (Well, getting to isn't really what needed to be done. The hotel was already a siamese twin/tumour to the EXTREMELY large McCormick center. Really, we just needed to drive around to the other side of it to park in the lower lot and make our way to the Arie Crown Theater) to practice for the Sunday morning service. As we go down 31st (I'm not sure on that number. It was something like that) toward Lake Shore Drive, we see part of Lake Shore Drive is blocked off. But why? A freaking Marathon. So, there's this random marathon happening right where we need to turn in. We do make it to the lower lot, race toward the Arie Crown Theater, and show up a half hour late. Despite all that, the car ride there was hilarious.
No one ever expects the Chicago marathon...
Sorry for that long story/anecdote/rant.
Anyway, the weekend was also incredibly refreshing spiritually as well as mentally and emotionally. I got to see a lot of people I haven't seen in at least a year, like Carl Sullivan and John Hyon. Met a lot of new people. Most of the new people I met served and played in the worship which may have been the best part of the weekend. The Arie Crown Theater seats about 4,000 people. We had about 2,000 college students attending the conference. Each night we played a set of worship music to 2,000 fired up college students. It was miraculous and placed me in a spot that made me feel completely and wholy intuned with everything. When I played and worshiped I was living inside the moment, focused on God and the rhythms, united in a beautiful way with all these people. Then on Sunday, the Chicago church as well as all the conference attendees from all over the country (and some from Canada, the Carribean, and South Africa) came together, filling the theater out completely. Amazing is the most simple and apt description I can give.
This past weekend was a weekend that gave me a certain hope. For a while my hope and dreams were beginning to dissipate. I was losing faith in what could be, what I wanted for myself in the future, and I figured all of what I dreamed of was impossible. I've reached my own conclusions that that is not entirely true.
Before I left, I started to study out in the Bible what it means to seek God. In the back of my smaller Bible I have a little concordence/index. I looked up 'seek' and read all the scriptures listed. One scripture I focused mainly on is from Matthew 6 where it says, "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you." I figured in order to see God, we must know what the kingdom is as well as righteousness.
After looking more, reading more, I came to the conclusion that if I want to seek God, I have to follow Jesus. "No one comes to the father except through me." That made sense to me, so I decided to follow Jesus through the gospels starting with Matthew (which I'm close to finishing).
When I was packing for the ICMC (International Campus Ministry Conference) I didn't know what the theme would be about or what sort of lessons were planned. So when I arrived and saw that the theme was "Follow Me", I was a little shocked. Just prior to driving up to Chicago I decided this is what I needed to do and study out in order to seek God. Things were beginning to align. Throughout the weekend I continued to read through Matthew, and as I did, the lessons in the evening would focus on scriptures I had read earlier that day. Not to be egotistical, but I think God prepared my heart for this weekend so that I would be attentive as well as impacted by the whole event.
There were also a lot of classes and lessons about the one-year challenge, the one-year challenge being taking a year out of your professional or academic life and going to another church to help in it's development and expand God's kingdom. There's a great need for it now, especially in places like South Africa, China, Turkey, Salt Lake City, and Anchorage Alaska.
This is something that has been on my heart for at least the last year. My passion for it dwindled considerably, as I said before I was losing my dreams thinking things like a full time job would put me down. Listening to people talk about the one-year challenge rekindled my dreams and desire to serve wherever in the world God wants me. If I could, I would go around the world for the rest of my life doing this, but that may not be in the play book. Hopefully, prayerfully, I can do the one-year challenge in the not-so distant future. Already I'm talking to a disciple in China about coming over and teaching English and help strengthen the churches there.
There's so much more I could talk about, but I feel like I've written too much.
As for the title of the post, I thought I would get to it sooner in my train of thought but apparently not. It was something I said during the course of the weekend. "Life is Donkey Kong" meaning, if life is some grand game, it wouldn't be one with bosses. We all have different bosses to face, we don't all live the same life and struggles, so to think of life as a Mario or Zelda or Final Fantasy game would not be true. Life is a high scoring game. You do the best possible, whatever that may be, and submit your score. Like Donkey Kong (the old one. Not Country). So, Life is Donkey Kong.
That didn't really have anything to do with the other 65 sentences, come to think of it.
Hope you enjoyed. Later gators.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Let's Close Out July With One More Post.
Since I have squandered this month away, I might as well. This month has been something. Like the famous (Or maybe infamous. Or maybe...nothing at all) month of July from 2007, July 2010 came and went like a demon apparition. To further detail my similie, a demon apparition from Ghost Hunters. It was like a subtle movement of shadow down a long dark corridor. A trick of the light. Perhaps a faint moan eminated from another realm just to reassure the witnesses the spirit was there for a moment, if anything. Or, perhaps it was just cat, slipping past giving a very low meow just before it disappeared. Either way, cat or demon apparition, this month came and left quickly, as if it were never there to begin with.
I have been working at my call center job for about 2 weeks now. I'm looking for the nearest exit though. Any sort of peep hole to tear open and slip through in order to see the light of day again (both figuratively and literally. There's absolutely no windows at my job. Like I'm in a fluorescent cave. Or prison. But I'm pretty sure even prison has windows. Never went to prison, so I couldn't be the authority on that subject.) would be taken advantage of immediately. I would also appreciate it much.
But, C'est la vie. I'm here. Trapped. Bricked in for the time being. No insane travels. Just here, still living with the parents, with a slight trickle of income. Keeping everyone else content with the notion that I'm working.
Our church is having it's annual International Campus Ministry Conference this weekend in Chicago. Very excited about it. I get to leave tomorrow, be gone for four days, and play music. Really, I'm planning to just live in Chicago. Not coming back. Staying there so I can plant my roots away from St. Louis for awhile. It would be an excuse to not go back and work with Spherion at the call center. I don't think I've ever been to Chicago...so this might be first. Very excited about going and not coming back. I'll try to make a few posts while I'm there though. Sort of as an exercise in travel writing.
I have been working at my call center job for about 2 weeks now. I'm looking for the nearest exit though. Any sort of peep hole to tear open and slip through in order to see the light of day again (both figuratively and literally. There's absolutely no windows at my job. Like I'm in a fluorescent cave. Or prison. But I'm pretty sure even prison has windows. Never went to prison, so I couldn't be the authority on that subject.) would be taken advantage of immediately. I would also appreciate it much.
But, C'est la vie. I'm here. Trapped. Bricked in for the time being. No insane travels. Just here, still living with the parents, with a slight trickle of income. Keeping everyone else content with the notion that I'm working.
Our church is having it's annual International Campus Ministry Conference this weekend in Chicago. Very excited about it. I get to leave tomorrow, be gone for four days, and play music. Really, I'm planning to just live in Chicago. Not coming back. Staying there so I can plant my roots away from St. Louis for awhile. It would be an excuse to not go back and work with Spherion at the call center. I don't think I've ever been to Chicago...so this might be first. Very excited about going and not coming back. I'll try to make a few posts while I'm there though. Sort of as an exercise in travel writing.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Hey Nerds, I'm Back.
And when I say, "Hey nerds" I know I'm actually just talking to David Lechner. Way to be, man. You make me feel as if my words do have some weight. Or at least a little bit of meaning.
That boy is getting married, too. Which is terrifying. For me. I don't know about him (See "1 Comments" at the bottom of this post later in the week).
Marriage itself is terrifying. Actually the whole process, not even just the marriage part, is terrifying. From, "Hey, I kinda like you" to "I do" is a whole long, tedious process. I can't even begin to imagine all the stuff after, "You may kiss the bride". It's too much. My little mind and heart can't handle it. That's why I'm going to be single for quite sometime. I'll tell the ladies out there right now, flat out, that if you even have anywhere from an atom of feeling for me all the way to crazed obssession, you'll just have to wait. Wait 15 years, then when you find me in Bangladesh, New Delhi, Tibet, Okanawa, Rio De Janeiro, Seattle or wherever I happen to be, and you're still interested, then I just might say "Okay, yeah sure." Until then...I've got some things to do.
Speaking of terrifying things in life...full time jobs. Jobs you work at 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, and include much fewer days of vacation than school. Yeah, tell me that's not terrifying. Doing the same dumb thing ALL THE TIME. No escape. Entrapment. I have just recently been hired on for a customer service/call center position. I've been in training from last Tuesday to Friday. I think I hate it. I need to get a job I enjoy, or go back to school and get my ESL certificate so I can leave this place and see the world. Or go back to school for something of worth. Any ideas?
I didn't really have anything to say, just wanted to kill some time and thought to update the ol' blog while I have internet access on the laptop. Take care readers (Dave). Sorry to have rushed this, but it is time for me to leave and attend other engagements.
Peace.
That boy is getting married, too. Which is terrifying. For me. I don't know about him (See "1 Comments" at the bottom of this post later in the week).
Marriage itself is terrifying. Actually the whole process, not even just the marriage part, is terrifying. From, "Hey, I kinda like you" to "I do" is a whole long, tedious process. I can't even begin to imagine all the stuff after, "You may kiss the bride". It's too much. My little mind and heart can't handle it. That's why I'm going to be single for quite sometime. I'll tell the ladies out there right now, flat out, that if you even have anywhere from an atom of feeling for me all the way to crazed obssession, you'll just have to wait. Wait 15 years, then when you find me in Bangladesh, New Delhi, Tibet, Okanawa, Rio De Janeiro, Seattle or wherever I happen to be, and you're still interested, then I just might say "Okay, yeah sure." Until then...I've got some things to do.
Speaking of terrifying things in life...full time jobs. Jobs you work at 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, and include much fewer days of vacation than school. Yeah, tell me that's not terrifying. Doing the same dumb thing ALL THE TIME. No escape. Entrapment. I have just recently been hired on for a customer service/call center position. I've been in training from last Tuesday to Friday. I think I hate it. I need to get a job I enjoy, or go back to school and get my ESL certificate so I can leave this place and see the world. Or go back to school for something of worth. Any ideas?
I didn't really have anything to say, just wanted to kill some time and thought to update the ol' blog while I have internet access on the laptop. Take care readers (Dave). Sorry to have rushed this, but it is time for me to leave and attend other engagements.
Peace.
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